FADE IN

Gabrielle sits alone on a riverbank, staring pensively into the water. Haimon approaches from behind with two apples.

HAIMON:
     Hungry?

Gabrielle shakes her head and Haimon comes over to sit beside her.

HAIMON:
     Are you all right?

GABRIELLE:
     I'm sorry about letting Siran wander off.

HAIMON (snorts in disbelief):
     So now you're listening to Sabina?

GABRIELLE:
     Why shouldn't I? She happens to be right. Siran is the best person I know. And while I was busy trying to prove to everyone what a good person I was, I made her doubt Sabina so much that she ran off.

HAIMON:
     Gabrielle, I don't think that's--

GABRIELLE:
     You know, I look at Siran and I see myself all those years ago. Maybe that's why I've been acting so--smug lately. Maybe I've been trying to convince myself that I haven't changed.

Haimon reaches out and takes Gabrielle's hand.

HAIMON:
     You are a good person, Gabrielle.

She smiles weakly.

HAIMON:
     ...and if anyone is to blame for Siran running off it's me.

Gabrielle opens her mouth to protest but Haimon holds up a hand.

HAIMON:
     No, it's true. We've been fighting so much lately. And instead of protecting Siran we let her just walk off. That was my fault. You and Xena... (He looks away from her) I've been so threatened by your relationship with Xena that I... (at a loss, he trails off)

Gabrielle looks down at her hand held in Haimon's, saying nothing. After a long moment, he sighs.

HAIMON:
     Anyway, I'm sorry.

Haimon stands and turns to walk away.

GABRIELLE:
     I love you, Haimon.

She is still looking down and doesn't see him stop and spin back towards her, a look of shock on his face which he quickly masks. When Gabrielle finally gathers the courage to look up she sees Haimon smiling gently. He offers her an apple.

HAIMON:
     Are you hungry?

She takes the apple and bites into it. Haimon looks out across the river.

HAIMON:
     I love you too, you know.

GABRIELLE (nodding shyly):
     I know...

Haimon leans down to kiss her. His lips barely brush hers and she pulls back.

GABRIELLE:
     The bell--

HAIMON:
     Would you just shut up and kiss me?

They kiss, slowly and tenderly.

DISSOLVE TO

The sun, which is now high in the sky.

A montage of images showing the sun advancing further toward evening.

DISSOLVE TO

The clearing with the tablet honoring Ares. It's late afternoon; the sun is about to set. Sven cautiously peers out from behind the tablet and then walks out into the clearing, sword at the ready. He looks around.

Haimon emerges from the trees, conspicuously carrying the orb and the scroll.

Sven's face lights up in triumph and he walks up to Haimon.

SVEN:
     Well, that's better! (reaches out) Hand them over!

HAIMON:
     Not until I know Siran is okay.

SVEN:
     Don't you worry, the girl is safe. (trying to be menacing) For the time being. I don't know how much longer I can hold my friend back. He is a fierce one--a true Viking.

HAIMON (rolls his eyes):
     Riiight. I'm going to see Siran now.

Sven tries glaring at him, but Haimon wins the staring contest, and Sven sighs and gives in.

SVEN:
     All right.

He turns and walks toward the trees, Haimon following him.

After they are gone, Gabrielle emerges cautiously from the trees on the other side of the clearing. She is followed by Xena and Sabina.

SABINA (sighs):
     I would love to make some chopped Viking tonight.

GABRIELLE (gives her an anxious look):
     Sabina...

SABINA (shakes her head):
     Don't worry. Siran wouldn't like it.

CUT TO

Another part of the woods. Siran sits on a tree stump, with Ragnar sitting at her feet.

RAGNAR:
     ...you don't say!

SIRAN (nods):
     Every word is true.

RAGNAR:
     So He isn't a sea god after all!

SIRAN:
     We worship the God of Love as revealed to us through Eli's teachings.

RAGNAR (miserably):
     I bet Eli didn't think stealing was right.

SIRAN:
     No. But he taught that a contrite heart paved the way to forgiveness.

Ragnar's face brightens.

RAGNAR:
     You mean if I said I was sorry--.

SIRAN:
     ...and promised to never again take anything that didn't belong to you.

RAGNAR:
     I do! I do!

Sven appears with Haimon behind him.

RAGNAR:
     Sven! Siran has been telling me the most wonderful story about her fish god--

SIRAN:
     The God of Love.

RAGNAR:
     Yes! The God of Love. He's not from the sea after all. And he thinks stealing is wrong.

SVEN:
     Wrong? Wrong for some lily-livered God of Love perhaps--but not wrong for Odin and his Vikings! I deny anyone to challenge us and our right to take what we please!

RAGNAR:
     I don't know, Sven. The way she was telling me about this fish-- (catches himself) about this love god, it sounded really nice.

Sven throws up his hands in exasperation.

SVEN:
     Odin help me, this whole operation has been on my shoulders since the beginning. Steal the scroll, kidnap the girl, write the ransom note, get the orb. All you had to do was watch the girl.

He scowls at Ragnar, who turns away sheepishly, and turns to Haimon.

SVEN:
     All right, you wanted to see the girl? Here's the girl. Now, hand over the scroll. Because I am running out of patience, and... (he strikes a pose) I am a Viking.

Haimon holds up his hands in an appeasing gesture. He glances at the sky, just as the last rays of sunlight fade.

HAIMON:
      Okay, okay. (he offers the orb and the scroll to Sven) You know, not for nothing, but you're a little over the top with this whole Viking thing.

SVEN:
     Hey! You're talking to Sven the Invincible.

In the background, Siran gets up and walks toward Haimon. With his back to her, Sven doesn't see her--he is too busy admiring the orb.

HAIMON (to Siran):
     Are you all right?

SIRAN:
     Yes, of course. (She smiles)

Sven walks triumphantly toward Ragnar and brandishes the orb.

SVEN:
     With this, Sven the Invincible will crush his enemies!

The bell rings. "Reset": Sven now stands in the same spot where he stood before.

Sven looks around in consternation as Ragnar stares at him uncomprehendingly.

Finally, Sven takes a deep breath, then raises the orb again and walks toward Ragnar.

SVEN:
     With this, Sven the Invincible will crush his enemies!

The bell rings. "Reset": Sven now stands in the same spot where he stood before.

With increasing bewilderment, Sven looks around. He looks suspiciously at Haimon, at Siran, and at Ragnar. Then he raises his finger ("I've got an idea!") and charges menacingly toward Haimon, brandishing the orb.

SVEN:
     With this, Sven the Invincible will crush his enemies!

The bell rings. "Reset": Sven now stands in the same spot where he stood before.

HAIMON (raises an eyebrow at him):
     Aren't you getting tired of this?

SVEN (affronted):
     No! The night is still young.

HAIMON (shrugs):
     Suit yourself.

Sven looks at him suspiciously, pondering his next move.

Just then, Sabina emerges from the trees. A look of relief is evident on her face as she sees Siran.

SABINA (with barely suppressed emotion):
     Siran...are you all right?

Siran runs to hug her.

Xena and Gabrielle come out, following Sabina.

GABRIELLE:
     Haimon! There you are. (smiles) Everything going all right?

HAIMON:
     Exactly as planned.

Sven glowers at Xena.

SVEN:
     Back for more, woman? Well, Sven the Invincible strikes again!

He charges at Xena.

HAIMON:
     Uh--bad idea.

He stands in Sven's way and Sven slams into him.

The bell rings. "Reset." Sven is back in his place.

SVEN (to Haimon):
     You dare to incite Sven the Invincible?

Clenching his fists, he advances on Haimon.

The bell rings. "Reset." Sven is back in his place.

SVEN (growing increasingly agitated):
     You dare to indict Sven the Invincible?

Clenching his fists, he advances on Haimon.

The bell rings. "Reset." Sven is back in his place.

SVEN (bellows):
     You dare to--

SABINA:
     Somebody gag him or we'll be here for hours.

Sven stops and looks around, breathing heavily, very confused. He turns to Ragnar, as if looking for help. Ragnar shrugs helplessly and spreads his arms, as if to say, "What can I do?"

SVEN:
     What--what in Odin's name is happening here? (understanding dawns on him) It's--it's this thing, isn't it? (He holds up the orb) It's cursed!

RAGNAR:
     What did I tell you?

SVEN (to Xena):
     Take it back!

XENA (shakes her head):
     I'm afraid it's not that simple. There's only one way out of this for you--

CUT TO

A long shot of the Elijan temple in Ostia. The sun is low over the horizon.

A close-up of the front of the temple.

Sven comes into view. Breathing heavily, he runs up the temple steps, his face drenched in sweat. Behind him, Xena comes up. Sven stops and turns.

SVEN (panting):
     Well? Hurry up, woman! We have to make it by sunset!

XENA (amused):
     Don't worry, we have plenty of time.

SVEN:
     You're not the one cursed with this thing for the rest of your life if we don't make it!

CUT TO

Inside the temple. A group of people in white robes are standing in a circle. Other people in ordinary garb crowd the temple as well.

The sound of chanting fills the temple. {1.35 MB} (Right-click or Ctrl-click sound icon to save file)

The camera pans slowly over the crowd, toward the altar over which hangs a banner with a fish symbol on it. By the altar stands a medium-height, slender, white-robed woman who looks to be in her early forties, her brown graying hair pinned at the back of her head, her bearing simple but dignified. She is reading aloud from the scroll brought by Siran (her words cannot be heard over the chanting). Siran stands by her side. Among the people in the crowd we see Felix and Petronia, the Elijans from Ashes to Ashes.

Pan to Xena, Gabrielle, and Haimon standing at the front of the crowd, slightly apart from the Elijans in white robes. Next to them stands Sven, holding the orb in his right hand and his horned hat in the other. Sweat is rolling down his face; he is fidgeting and looking about nervously.

Zoom in on Sven as he leans toward Xena.

SVEN (in a loud whisper):
     Are you sure the sun hasn't set yet?

As the chanting continues, the camera pulls back to show a white-robed girl of about fourteen walking down the aisle toward the altar, carrying a ceremonial chalice.

Zoom in on Xena, Gabrielle, Haimon and Sven.

The bell rings. "Reset":

The camera pulls back to show a white-robed girl walking down the aisle toward the altar, carrying a ceremonial chalice.

A slightly alarmed murmur goes through the crowd but is drowned out by the chanting.

Zoom in on Xena, Gabrielle and Haimon, who turn to give Sven a puzzled look.

Sven spreads his arms slightly and shrugs, as if to say, "I have no idea what I did!"

The girl reaches the altar and hands the chalice to the older woman, who takes a few sips and puts the chalice down on the altar. Then, she turns to Sven and holds out her hand, smiling graciously.

XENA (whispers):
     You're on.

Sven gives a start, then walks toward the woman. The chanting stops.

Sven hands the woman the orb and she takes it. Breathing a huge sigh of relief, Sven backs away. He bumps into Xena and almost jumps.

FELIX:
     My fellow Elijans, the new leader of our faith--Calpurnia!

The people assembled in the temple bow their heads in prayer. The chanting resumes.

Close-up on Sven as he breathes a huge sigh of relief and wipes his forehead.

Medium close-up of Xena, Gabrielle and Haimon as they exchange smiles.

DISSOLVE TO

Outside the temple. Sven comes out the door, putting the horned hat back on his head with a satisfied smile. He stops and looks around.

SVEN (raising his voice):
     Ragnar? Where are you?

A stocky man in a white robe comes out of the temple. As the camera zooms in on him, we see that it's Ragnar.

RAGNAR (timidly):
     Sven?

Sven turns and freezes, staring incredulously at Ragnar.

SVEN:
     What in Hella's name happened to you, man? Why are you dressed like one of those sissies in there? (gestures toward the temple) You are a Viking!

RAGNAR (sighs):
     Sven...I want to stay here. I really liked what that girl told me about their God. I want to be nice, like her.

SVEN:
     Wimp!

He takes a swing and is about to slap Ragnar on the head; then he pauses and looks nervous, as if waiting to be interrupted by the bell. A moment later, obviously realizing that he's not under the bell's effect anymore, he brings his hand down and sighs.

SVEN:
     Well, then--I guess I'll just have to go home by myself. If I ever get enough money for a boat.

RAGNAR (sighs):
     I'll miss you, Sven.

SVEN (looks at him thoughtfully):
     You know? Maybe I'll hang around here for a while. I bet there isn't one tavern in this whole town that serves real Viking food. Herring! Glogg! It'll be a big hit!

RAGNAR (eyes lighting up):
     Now you're talking! Hey, I could help you out with that. (He pauses, suddenly looking dubious, and looks back at the temple.) If--if it's okay with their God, of course.

In the background, Xena, Gabrielle, Haimon and Siran can be seen coming outside the temple.

SVEN (growls irritably):
     Are you a man or a sheep?

Ragnar looks at him and his face brightens.

RAGNAR:
     Sheep! (Obviously thinking that he and Sven are back to playing their game, he pauses a moment) A Valkyrie or a goat?

Sven growls and slaps Ragnar upside the head.

In the background, we see Sabina approach. Siran runs toward her.

DISSOLVE TO

Dusk. A campfire in a clearing. Xena and Ares are sitting by the fire. His arm is around her shoulder.

XENA:
     So what do you think? Is there a lesson in this story?

ARES:
     Yeah. Beware Elijans bearing talismans.

Xena chuckles and squeezes his hand.

Pan to Gabrielle, Darion and Haimon coming out of a grove and toward the campfire. Gabrielle and Haimon are walking hand in hand, smiling.

XENA (thoughtfully):
     Looks like Gabrielle and Haimon have learned a few things about getting along.

ARES:
     Pity. I was just starting to like him.

Xena chuckles indulgently.

Gabrielle, Haimon and Darion approach.

XENA (looks up):
     So. Everything all right?

GABRIELLE:
      No problem at all.

DARION:
     Gabrielle-- (zoom in on his face) why does Aphrodite have so many swimming instructors?

The camera pulls back as Gabrielle, Xena, Haimon, and even Ares exchange shocked looks, as we:

FADE OUT

THE END

[Ares' godly powers were not damaged during the production of this motion picture. Sadly, the same cannot be said of the Vikings' reputation.]

Xena: Warrior Princess Shipper Seasons Season 9 Episode 7 Take Two Story By: Sais 2 Cool and LadyKate Written By: Sais 2 Cool and LadyKate Collage By: Aurora Images Gathered By: Aurora Cast Xena Lucy Lawless Gabrielle Renee O'Connor Ares Kevin Smith Haimon Michael Vartan Darion Alexander Gandar Sabina Jennifer Garner Siran Ebonie Smith Sven Ben Reed Ragnar John Macoly Carminus Josh Carlion Original Airdate July 2, 2005 Ares' godly powers were not damaged during the production of this motion picture. Sadly, the same cannot be said of the Vikings' reputation. DEDICATED TO KEVIN SMITH All characters and storylines that have appeared in the syndicated series Xena: Warrior Princess are a copyright and trademark of Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No infringement was intended during the writing of this script. All original characters and storylines are a copyright of the respective authors and of the Shipper Seasons. No script may be reproduced on a website elsewhere without the author's consent. © Shipper Seasons www.shipperseasons.com

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