FADE IN

On the same scene in the tavern. Xena and Gabrielle, who have stood up, are looking sympathetically at Ariadne, who has tears streaming down her face.

ARIADNE (whispers):
     I ruined everything...

DARION (tugs at Xena's skirt):
     Aren't you going to bring him back?

XENA (looks down at him):
     Me?

DARION (as if it were self-evident):
     Yeah. That girl--she's really upset because he left. Gabrielle told me you always help people when they're in trouble.

GABRIELLE:
     Darion, this really isn't Xena's kind of thing...

ARIADNE (stands up; she seems slightly stunned):
     I feel so foolish... (Her eyes fall on Xena and she walks toward her) He was talking to you when I came in--do you know him?

XENA:
     No, he just came up to ask me something.

GABRIELLE:
     I think he said his name was Cyril.

ARIADNE (nods):
     Thank you.

She starts walking toward the door. Eliante and Polemos start following her, but she turns and holds out her hand to stop them with a gesture more imploring than imperious.

ARIADNE:
     Please don't follow me. I--want to be alone right now.

She walks out.

CUT TO

A deserted stretch of road, with a field on one side of it and woods on the other. Cyril comes riding at breakneck speed. Seeing a flash of golden light ahead of him, he slows down. Aphrodite appears, lounging casually on a large piece of rock by the roadside.

CYRIL (angrily):
     Aphrodite.

APHRODITE (with amused exasperation):
      Well?

CYRIL (bitterly):
     Just leave me alone. You've meddled enough.

APHRODITE (pouts):
     Hey! I was just trying to give you what you wanted. It's not my problem if you chickened out.

CYRIL (quietly):
     I'm in love with her. Don't you get it?

APHRODITE (sighs):
     Okay, I guess that wasn't really part of the plan.

CYRIL (pleading):
     Aphrodite, can't you reverse the spell?

APHRODITE:
     Oh, so now you want it reversed. Well, sorry--it can't be done. I mean it just doesn't work this way. (She notices Cyril's stricken look and frowns a little, then perks up) Hey, maybe you've just got the jitters.

CYRIL:
     Forget it, Aphrodite.

He kicks his horse in the sides and takes off riding again.

APHRODITE (looks after him, pursing her lips, and sighs):
     He's got the jitters.

She disappears in the usual shower of golden sparks.

CUT TO

The dining room at the inn.

ELIANTE (sighs):
     Poor girl! She's such a sensitive creature...

POLEMOS (grumbling):
     Too sensitive, if you ask me, for someone who may have to rule a kingdom someday. (After an awkward silence, he turns to Xena and Gabrielle and smiles.) Xena! Gabrielle! It's good to see you again. I'd heard all these stories that you were still around and hadn't aged, but wasn't sure whether to believe them.

XENA (looks at him, smiling almost in disbelief):
     Polemos.

POLEMOS:
     I know, I looked a lot younger last time we met. You're still remembered very well at King Nestor's court. (Turns to Eliante) It's been almost thirty years since these two wonderful women were passing through our kingdom and rescued the king's younger sister from a terrible... (he pauses, hemming and hawing, obviously uncomfortable)

DARION (excited):
     --monster?

POLEMOS (looks at him curiously):
     Xena, is that your--? (Xena shakes her head with a wistful look on her face) Gabrielle--?

GABRIELLE (her face reflects a momentary struggle, then she smiles):
     He's--adopted.

POLEMOS (beams):
     Ah. Anyway--yes, from a terrible monster. (He gives Xena and Gabrielle a surreptitious "don't say anything" pleading look)

DARION:
     Great! (To Gabrielle) You're going to tell me about it sometime, aren't you?

GABRIELLE (pats him on the shoulder):
     Darion, I have so many stories to tell you...

XENA (to Gabrielle in a half-whisper):
     Yeah, but how many of them involve a princess with a gambling addiction?

GABRIELLE (nods toward Polemos):
     Shhh!

There is a commotion outside. The door is pushed open, and a warrior in ornate armor runs in. He is stocky, with dark curly hair, a ruddy complexion, small eyes and a wide nose.

WARRIOR:
     The princess!

POLEMOS (alarmed):
     What about the princess?

WARRIOR:
     She bolted! Took my horse and rode away!

POLEMOS:
     Mopsus, you dolt! You should have stopped her! You're the captain of the guard!

MOPSUS (embarrassed):
     Well, it's not as if I could just grab her royal highness...

ELIANTE:
     Did you see which way she went?

MOPSUS (fidgets):
     I...I didn't look--I was in too much of a rush to tell you...

DARION:
     She probably went looking for that man she liked.

MOPSUS (glares at him):
     What man?

POLEMOS:
     Never mind. (nervously) Xena--Gabrielle--do you think that maybe you could help out, for old times' sake? King Nestor is a good and kind ruler, but if he finds out that we lost his little girl... I'm sure you could help us find her...

MOPSUS (outraged):
     Wait a minute--what about me? I'm still the captain of the princess's guard--it's my job...

XENA (smirks):
     Behave yourself and you might keep it.

Mopsus almost visibly chokes on his indignation.

POLEMOS (hopefully):
     You'll help us then?

GABRIELLE (smiles at him and pats his arm):
     We will.

ELIANTE:
     We'll go get our things right away--

XENA:
     While you do that, Gabrielle and I need to go have a private chat with--a friend. (Gabrielle gives her a questioning look and Xena mouths, "Aphrodite.") We'll meet you back here in an hour. Come on, Gabrielle.

They start walking toward the door, Darion right behind them.

XENA (to Darion):
     You wait for us here.

DARION (looks stricken):
     Please take me along--please! You're going to meet your boyfriend, aren't you?

XENA (chokes):
     My bo--

GABRIELLE (gives Xena an amused look, then to Darion):
     No, we're not, honey.

XENA (thoughtfully):
     We may have to.

GABRIELLE:
     Xena, Aphrodite's the one who seems to be mixed up in this.

XENA:
     I know, but at least Ares always shows up when you call him.

GABRIELLE (teasing):
     When you call him.

XENA (innocent look):
     That's what I said.

DARION:
     Take me with you--I want to see him too! Please? I want to see that light trick!

XENA (wryly, to an uncomfortable-looking Gabrielle):
     Well, at least he likes someone else besides Joxer... (to Darion, with a sigh) All right, come on.

GABRIELLE (defensively, as they walk through the door):
     Maybe the boy just wants a male role model.

CUT TO

A meadow outside the village. Xena and Gabrielle come out of the grove on the edge of the meadow, Darion tagging along and holding Gabrielle's hand.

XENA:
     All right, do it your way. You call Aphrodite. I count to ten and if she doesn't show, I'm calling Ares so he can get Aphrodite for us.

GABRIELLE:
     Aphrodite!

XENA (mutters rapidly):
     One-two-three--

There is a flash of golden light and sparks, and a beaming Aphrodite stands before them.

XENA (slightly disappointed):
     Aphrodite.

DARION (awed):
     She can do that light thing too?

APHRODITE (squeals):
     Warrior Babe! Gabrielle! It's great to see you again.

XENA (suspiciously):
     Did you happen to be nearby?

APHRODITE (slightly embarrassed):
     No... (off Xena's glare) Oh all right, I was. So? First you call me and now I'm like, what--not welcome?

XENA (wryly):
     That wouldn't have anything to do with a young man named Cyril?

APHRODITE (fixed up her hair, giggling a little):
     Well...

XENA:
     Come on, Aphrodite, out with it. What are you up to?

APHRODITE:
     Well, it was a little over a year ago... See, I was in one of my temples--you know, inspecting the offerings--and the door was open and this dog ran inside...

GABRIELLE:
     Aphrodite...can we just focus on Cyril?

APHRODITE (offended):
     That's what I'm trying to do here! Hold on a minute, will ya...? So, where was I?

DARION (helpfully):
     In one of your temples.

APHRODITE (looks at him curiously):
     Oh yeah...big bro said you had a kid tagging along with you!

DARION (indignantly):
     I'm not tagging along. I'm her sidekick! (points to Gabrielle)

Gabrielle laughs.

XENA (impatiently):
     Can we cut to the chase?

APHRODITE:
     Okay, okay. Don't be so grumpy. So, I was in my temple, and what do you know--

As she speaks, we dissolve to:

GABRIELLE (shocked):
     You turned the dog into a man...just like that?

APHRODITE (beaming):
     Yeah! Piece of cake--well, for a goddess.

GABRIELLE:
     That's not what I meant! Didn't you think about the consequences? You know--playing with somebody's life like that?

APHRODITE:
     Come on, Gabrielle, give me a break. (pouts) I had only just gotten my godhood back--I was, you know, trying out my powers to see if everything was still working and all... Besides, it was a dog! Hello?

XENA (obviously wants to say something sharp but then bites her tongue):
     So, then what happened?

APHRODITE:
     Then... Well, I gave him some nice clothes and that bracelet he got back for me and sent him to a nearby town. Then I thought I'd check up on the kid a coupla months later...you know, like following up on my, what do you call it... (crinkled up her eyebrows) ...project or something.

XENA (impatiently):
     The princess. Where does she come in?

APHRODITE:
     Ex-squeeze me! Are you gonna let me tell the story or not? So, I checked up on the kid a couple of months later...and the poor thing was soooo majorly bummed. Said he'd never had any idea that it was so tough to be human. (giggles) Boy, can I ever relate to that! So...oh yeah. Anyway, he said he wanted to be a dog again.

GABRIELLE:
     And--?

APHRODITE:
      And, I thought I'd do something--you know, different. Fun. Creative. Instead of just going "poof!" and turning him back into a doggie. Something that would be in my line of work. You know--as the Goddess of Love. So, I came up with a really cool spell...

XENA (grimly):
     And that would be--?

APHRODITE:
     A princess has to fall in love with him. As soon as she kisses him, he's going to turn back.

Xena frowns and Gabrielle stares at Aphrodite in dismay as we:

FADE OUT

END OF ACT ONE